The Big Zero

December 29, 2009

oh paul. what a downer you are paul. what to call the first decade of the new millenium: the big zero

in other media, the image is a funny image. has to do with a conversation i was having with bejai and sarah. more on sarah in the next paragraph.

in other news, i am at home. home is nice. there is some anxiety. i have not read many books. i am not sleeping well or a lot. i want to exercise. it is cold. my arms are weak. i feel that i will be home for too short a time. but also too long a time. i wish not to lose my momentum but go-go-going it is. i like sarah. i like to be with sarah. it is really nice to be with sarah. i am making some sketchy new friends on craigslist. jeepers!

during the new year for the first time in a while i will not be kissing anyone. is that what freedom is? since you dont know the images in my brain, you dont know whether or not that is what freedom is.


christmas eve

December 25, 2009

i cant say im a fan of this holiday. what i can say is that i hate this holiday!

home is better than it has been in the past. im going to do much more consumption this year because R2 told me that R1 is sad because R1 never gets any christmas presents but his friends all do and they ask him what he got and he says “nothing” and its sad. whatever R1. you shouldnt care so much about other people wasting the earth’s resources. but he does. and i know that i did too, at his age. and so i got him this book. which i secretly want to keep for myself but i will be generous and give it to him! i got D this book which me and bejai both love. and so does jim hartley, incidentally…and R2 a very expensive tuner, and M some sweet jewelry & music, and B this book which was for one of my classes last spring.

this presents thing is fun. materialistic, horrible for the earth, but fun fun fun. all the wrapping and hopefully some smiles tomorrow. (bejai, i have SO MANY PRESENTS for u!!! i hope u r cited :)) i havent seen friends or luvr yet…which is weird. school let out laaaate this year. thank jebus! i havent talked to princessgreensocks or kaushik in a few days…and that feels weird and unnatural.

on another note, i googled “christmas sucks” and found this gem. very depressing, but #268 is funny. yes.

this was a long post. cramming a lot in. we will see how things proceed. there has already been one yelling. i hope there wont be many more…